shoe shopping with a cute baby!! (:

today i went to royal sporting house at bukit panjang for a while to look at shoes after eating fattening kfc.
haha.. and i was looking at the shoes and i saw this cute little malay baby boy..
super cute.. he was asking his dad for a ball..
so his daddy took a football for him.
then when my mummy got off the seat, he climbed on and sat next to me..
haha. by that time, his dad put the ball backk..
i was like stoning then i heard "aunty, ball ball."
haha. i went to take the football for him to play with..
then he was holding onto it for a while.. and he kept smiling at me!!
so cute.. then he went "aunty, put back can?"
so i put the ball back and walked around the shop looking at the nike dri-fit tops and the slippers.
then suddenly he came over and held my hand...
then his daddy was asking him "why you hold her hand? where you want to take her?"
then he just smiled and laugh.. then he let go..
haha.. cute right?
i was about to leave then he saw me and "AUNTY!! LOOK!! MY SHOE MY SHOE!!"
so cuteeeeeeee....
i saw him somewhere else while i was walking and i will hear "AUNTY!!"
even though i do not agree with him that i am an aunty.. he's so cute that i'll forgive him.

haha.. yupyup. so i didn't find my shoes..
and i went to queensway shopping centre to look at shoes..
and i bought my shoes!! haha. they make my feet look cute.. kinda reminds me of my reebok one that stayed with me for 4 trusty years until it abandoned me this year.
haha. but im happy!! i got loads of work to do.. but i needa share wad we were talking about it church today..

in church we were talking about walking in the life of the Lord.
and how a Christian should behave.
why people chase after the darkness and such stuff..
we started by talking about why do people run away from the life of Godliness instead the follow trends that are set up by our modern society.
we were talking about clubbing and the proper behaviour.
being Christians, we hold the name of Jesus in our daily lives..
how we live reflects on what christianity is about..
we were asked "if Jesus, lived in this time, would he go clubbing?"
the answer is YES. Jesus would try to reach out to the masses of people who are running away from Him and turning to a life more fun and free. like he did the the gospel, he reached out to the tax-collectors and the prostitutes.
but one thing is that we too can go clubbing, on the condition that we have.. SELF-CONTROL.
it is one of the fruit of the spirit and without self-control, we not only harm ourselves, we harm others.
another thing we talked about was being able to club.. but only when we are of the legal age.
because going in illegally is a very selfish thing to do..
not only may we get ourselves into trouble if the place is raided by police, the club owners too will get into trouble.
a lot of issues were talked about today..
and we had this argument/debate on it..
i learnt a lot today about the type of life we should lead. also the way we behave.
and one thing i'll always remember is.. what does it mean to walk in the light of the Lord?
1 John 1:5 tells us that walking in the light of the Lord is accepting the fact that we are sinners even though we are christians and live the life that we are supposed to.. just because we are christians does not make us perfect and non-sinners. we all are.. but it's only if we dare to humble ourselves and admit our mistakes, will we be walking in His light.

alright. that's the main points we were discussing today..
i needa go complete my chinese homework now before lao shi decides to slaughter me.
bahh.. goodbye world.

was dead tired today lahh..
so many things happened. and i had so much time on my hands to kill.
i skipped my dinner today due to accumulation of lipids of unknown origins.
i realised my geog test is dead cos i read the question as
"highlight the difference between percolation and infiltration"
when the real question is..
"highlight the difference between percolation and through fall"
HAHA. im so dead. haii..
what to do? im doomed.
ohoh. and i've currently stopped pmsing..
so i like to tell myself.
had math department test today..
and im so prepared for a single digit to appear on my test paper.
which math test paper asks for the definitions for population and sample?
so rubbish!!
yupyup. our progress report is coming back soon.
but our teachers don't let us see our results first. :(
oh wells. we realised our econs are doing pretty badly 'cos mcq has a super low weightage for our CA
and everyone is class only does well in mcq!!
but we got one A and two Bs in my class for econs.
well.. the rest are Cs, Ds, Es and Os.

im living my life pretty fine now..
everyone's asking ade and well.. just gotta tell her to tell them the truth as little as i like it.
i miss him.
3 more months to go..
and by then my promos will be over.
my chinese AO will be over.
everything will have changed by then..
his feelings?
maybe. everything is so uncertain now..
but i'll survive till then.. i hope.

ive got so many things to complain about and no one to hear me..
haha. thanks felice, sky, ade, faisal, nancy, cuijing.
for hearing me out all at one shot.
i know everyone's afraid of politics and all..
but don't worry. i wont' let anything affect anything.
i just can't stand how people just respect no one but themselves.
so why should i respect them (or in this case him)?
*screams*
im dead tired today.
had choir pt which was a real failure.
but i got my exercise (: (: (:

BURN THOSE FAT!!

oh happy day

people people!! im fine!! (:

it's been like one week since i last broke down and all..
i guess i put my attention and focus on some other things now..
i still miss him though. but im not gonna push it. makes things worse.
and praying does help!! anyone got prayer request?

haha. i guess the exam stress is getting to me now..
it's like 2 more months before the promos and the chinese AO exam.
and boy oh boy am i excited mann..
'cos after the exams.. i am so going down somewhere to play volleyball!!
(: (: (:
after pe and all. i appreciate volleyball even though i can't play it.
and yes. im so going to go kayaking at the same time get my tan!!
so many things to do. but i do hope i get promoted.
i never do well in exams.
haii..
haha. but it's a good day today.
i ended up in the sick bay again. sucks.
tried falling asleep by this "siren" kept disturbing me.
(siren is a j2 girl that i don't know)
haha. yeah.. so left and went back to class.
poor helmi was stuck in the sick bay for so long.
he slept for so long. heavy sleeper didn't wake up.
stayed back and studied my geog and did my gp.
so yup!! im sorta brain dead now..
so im gonna relax a little (: (: (:

rojak

everytime i feel like crying..
i remember what ching told me once.
"hide those tears girl."
thanks ching.

i guess it's all about the process.
first we endure the pain and tears.
next you find that you soon get immuned to it.
after that, you begin to realise that life has to go on.
and there's no point worrying about what is to come.

and it's difficult to walk around school nowadays
for it's where the happy memories once were.

every night i pray and thank my Daddy for wad has passed.
i ask Him to help me grow stronger.
to take away the pain.
to be with me each step of the way for no one else can.
i talk to Him about my worries and my pains.
i ask about the future.
and im still confused. though it's nice to know im talking to someone.

AND i found a new way to release my anger and sadness.
instead of screaming and crying.
i write it down and i either burn it.. or i tear it up.
after that i'll stuff my head into my books and start my daily routine.
im kinda sick of this life.

went back to mgs today.
quite fun.
i missed mgs a lot.
caught up with my friends.
and when gerry was giving the speech, i was about to tear.
my home for 10 years of my life.
i miss you, mgs.

micro-shopping

* i seem to be getting weird calls from private numbers and no one talks on the other line, quite frequently.

todayy.. i wanted to sleep in.. but damn that biological clock.
humph. so i woke up and relived my childhood and started watching kids central.
haha. people think it's uncool to watch cartoons at this age..
but heyy!! there's a child in everyone of us.
and in fact.. my class was talking about our childhood the other day in school.
haha. we were talking about pokemon. powerpuff girls. power rangers..
quite funny lahh.. all the stupid things that we used to like and do.
and i was online and i talked to gaby!! (:
and she's coming back in august!! happy happy! (:
all of you running off to other countries and not visiting ever deserve to be shot!
but im happy she's coming back.
ian's back for ns. kah foon's back for holiday!
i hope mel&dennis comes back soon though i just saw them in aussie.
xiaoxi came back but i didn't see her..
and the worst is when milene came back from australia, i went to australia.
sucks. haha. BUT do come back ok?! i'll wait for you babe.

monday, im going back to mgs!!
and i bought my court shoes which i'll probably only wear once today.
just specially for the blazer. haii..
so EXCITING!! i saw this red and brown shoes today!! pretty!!
didn't get it though :(
i went to cut my fringe just now.. 'cos it was like in the mid-length.
and i can't use a hair band i can't pin it and it's too short to put behind my ears.
but it doesn't look like there's a difference.
haha. i bought like 4 hairbands to replace those that broke in school.
out of 6 i bought last time, only 2 survived.
so i had to replace them. HAHA.
i bought red. blue. white. pink!! (: happy.
mummy found plastic ear studs for me so my ear holes won't close.
since i might be allergic to some of those weird materials.. so i got plastic!!
and they don't rust!! (:
for the rest of the day, i think im gonna sleep.
then i'm gonna wake up and read my gp notes.
i can't afford to fail my gp. and im gonna revise my geog.
i'll do econs and math tomorrow. yup. that's the master plan.
goodnight world.

i can't wait!!

thanks bunkie for walking me home.

monday monday monday!!
haha. and latifah already told us her brilliant plan on monday!! (:
so many things to look forward for on monday
mgs mgs mgs mgs mgs..
syf concert!!
so many many things.
so exciting.

wait let me scold people first.
i'd like to ask a favour from people who ask for the sake of asking.
if you already know the answer, please don't ask.
especially if you were there to spite me in any way.
and in fact.. you may ask.. but you don't have to shout it out loud in a place where the ceiling is low and really really good echoing alright?
and because of that one stupid action..
everywhere i go, i get the same question.
please.. i know your happy with your girl.. but PLEASE stop rubbing in it..
*screams* in fact you don't have to say that "oh it's ok. you still have me"
what a load of bull.
even if i were to be a spinter all my life, you'd be the last person i'd choose.
and i have not forgotten anything that has passed and everything he's done for me.
so please.. don't talk like you know me so darn well.
(im sure you all know who im talking about if your close to me)

ahhh.. back to the day.
we ordered pizza for lunchie. and haha. too full lahh..
kenneth took a piece from us and shaowei took the last piece.
i would have eaten it but there was large amounts of red chilli on it..
and it looked scary anyway.
had gp. miss lee gave sympathy marks.. so now 4 people in our class passed gp.
how sweet. the rest.. like me.. are going to have to go for intensive remedial so that we won't screw our future up.
yupyup. had choir after that. i was dead tired already lahh..
and it's like.. 3 hours.
had voice training. and my match would be jazreel!!
yay!! though stupid meatball said that me and cuijing's voice are too distinct on its own.
haii.. they can hear us even if we sing as a choir.
so sad. i needa do something about my voice so that i can blend.
sang christmas carols and i begin to wonder.. WE'RE LIKE 5 MONTHS EARLY!!
haha. went home after that.
i really felt like walking home again.. but my bag was heavy!!
i realised that i just might walk home from school everyday.
it takes about 20 mins or so.. and it's especially good if i have company.
but sadly, NO ONE STAYS NEAR ME!! they stay around choa chu kang.
but then again. walking alone can be fun!!
i might just do that from next week on!! yay yay yay!!

i feel like it's a lot easier to smile knowing that you're somewhere smiling too.
(: (: (:
what's it about you that makes you so special?

when im missing you..

my damn pms is acting up again.
i put in so much effort to keep the pain inside
and it had to come out today.
shit.. now everything's worse than it already is.
i guess there's really nothing much i can do.
whether it all works out depends on the future.
the future, something that cannot be predicted.
i miss you, february 12.

im sorry to all those i blew up at today.

thanks ching. ade. bunkie. sky.
you guys rock!!

there's nothing more i can do already.
i blew my chances of a perfect future.
i blew it by the drop of one teardrop.

visit to the national skin centre

memories

byebye love.

5 months and 4 days.

i'll be patient
i'll grow
i'll learn
i'll wait.
i won't give up.

things are complicated so don't bother guessing.
they're not as direct as you think.

thanks all who bothered to listen to me..
and even hear me cry.

hey juliet

HEY JULIET!! (:

FUNNY this is one song that i have never gotten sick off!!
haha.. i feel so old school. like im living in the ancient times!! (:
but i like this song!! it's so catchy and niceee.
though i think in some parts of the song, the guy is a little egoistic.
but yeahh..
i went to the doctors today!!
and gosh i waited for like 2 hours!! wasted my precious life..
im having an appointment with the skin specialist on like THE END OF AUGUST?!
that's a very long time to go.. but i dunno.
it's so irritating sometimes, i'd rather wish i have oily skin that sensitive skin.
this sucks lahh..
so i'll be heading down to the doctors again in the near future.
i should just quit school and stay in a hospital..
haii.. but i won't. i got my long life ahead of me..
my mummy as asking me today "don't you wish you've graduated?"
i was like YEA!! i would be on 7 months holiday!!
marv. splendid.
then i would be able to do the things i wanna do..
try the things i wanna try..
got horse back riding!! spend all my work's pay to pamper myself instead of having allowance which is used to pay the school for notes and stuff.
AND I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE 25TH OF JULY TO ARRIVE!!
mgs founder's day!!
back to school with all my girlfriends.
in a way i miss the all girls school life..
though i dun quite miss mgs that much due to politics and crapp..
i really miss the life of all girls school..
though we get the bitching.. and yelling.. the screaming..
at least you hang around girls and you don't need to worry to much about how people think of you.. don't need to worry about hanging around guys and getting rumours spread throughout the school about you.
*screams*
but im going back!! and i am so so excited (: (:
YAY!! im going to sleep now.. 'cos i got no mood for everything..
i still got lots of stuff to settle with my heart.

good and bad day

today is a good day!! (:
can anyone tell me why today is a good day?!?!?!
haha. cos i had choir!! i missed choir real bad..
miss ong had a make over!! i had a shock of my life!!
and today we were trying to find the breaking points of every one..
apparently, mine is a D-sharp!! (:
not too bad i hope.
and we're practicing for christmas already..
we are early!! (: (: we're learning nice christmas songs!!
haha. and we might have a joint concert with nyjc as they are facing the same problem as us.. only that they have more guys than girls, and we're the other wayy around!!




guess who's that?!?! JULIAN HEE!! (:
mind you, he's the only local actor/model that i actually think is cute for such a long time ok?
haha. i think im crazeee..
and for goodness sake.. he has 8 packs!!
haha. as an eye candy that's good.. but as a real person.. haha.
scaryy!!

but why isn't today a good day?
because it's beginning to settle in now.
after so long ever since everything happened,
it finally fell upon me that it isn't about how hard i try anymore.
we need two hands to clap afterall..
my fears are beginning to settle in..
initially, i had full confidence, but as time goes by..
i begin to fear.. fear everything that is to come.
i see everyone happy around me..
i can't help but feel like there's an empty feeling inside.
i spend my days behind a happy facade.
but afterall, i know i'm gonna hang on..
the process if painful yet worth it.

DIE ADE!!

adeline yeong mun yan is tired of living.
she set up my email address for me with a stupid username because she knew i needed a new account.
haha. imagine this as your email address..
ihaveyellowfeathers@gmail
she's weird lahh.. haha. her inspiration
05A07 calls me big bird for goodness sake..
they all say i look like that big yellow bird from sesame street. haii..
to think my good friend got her inspiration from there.

been damn stressed lately.
i drew the demographic transition model 7 times at home..
and during the test i screwed up.. shite..
and after spending 6 hours of study time on geog, i felt like i might as well just have played during the 6 hours.
then i postponed my econs test.
and miss kat was angry.. poot thing.. she was sick and i made her angry. haii..
so my econs is tomorrow..
my eom is due tomorrow.
everything's tomorrow.
thank God i got choir tomorrow. stress relieve!!
i miss choir badly.
i miss so many things badly.
but patience is the way to go!! (:
i can do it!!

ching >> thanks for the encouragement!!

yeahh.. im gonna shower and then after that im gonna revise my econs and then sleep.
im dead tired.
stupid latifah had a long rest today 'cos she didn't come to school. bahh.

thanks a bunches!!

JULIAN HEE IS BACK ON HEARTLANDERS!!

(: (: (: your all going to tell me to be faithful..
but im just looking!! i still love my boy a lot!!

as most of you can tell, im getting a whole lot better.
the only problem now is that i have to motivate myself to study hard for the promos.
it's not going to be easy cos ive always had someone to study with.
BUT im gonna try cos i have no intention of wasting another year in school studying.
im still trying to cope and adapt to the changes&distance though.

thanks..
babee >> for bothering to talk through things with me and always keeping my faith&hopes high. you go study hard and make this hard horrible time worth while ok? don't worry.. i'll hang onto you even if there was just a slightest chance that this will last. just go do your work and concentrate on it ya?

shirlene >> for listening to me and talking to me, encouraging me through all these and my past problems. your really a gem. it's always good to talk to someone older cos at my level of thinking, im not matured enough to handle this the easiest wayy..

ade >> thank you for listening to me for the past 3 years.. this is probably the most difficult one to go through and im glad that your still willing to listen to me after all this while. im sorry for burdening you with my problems sometimes.. but you never fail to listen and help. and confort me. thanks girl.

rach >> thank you for always being someone that i can talk to.. someone that i can cry to when i really need to let everything out.. thanks for your patience with me and all..

chah >> thankyou for giving up time to listen to me.. even though your with giff, you'd still call back. thanks a lot girl. you really understand me..

ching >> for just cheering me up all the time.. even though shir told you before i did anything.. thanks for being understanding that bothering to help me on my emotional part.

you people are the greatest people i can ever find. i love you all.

&even some people whom i didn't tell anything to yet you all knew.

thanks sky. dexter. jackson. nancy. sally.

& i detest PW!! it's ridiculous how pw has individual work now!! shite..
EoM!! how the heck am i to find 3 articles on like pregnancy? THE PROBLEMS WITH PREGNANCY?!?!?!
im losing it already!! i have the same teacher for everything..
i wanted to cry when i looked at the work piled up and all the stuff that i yet have to do. haii..
i have this feeling im like going to flunk everything at the end of the year at the rate im going.

to you:

how do i,
get through one night without you?
if i had to live without you,
what kind of life would that be?
and i, i need you in my arms
need you to hold
you're my world, my heart, my soul

if you ever leave,
baby you would take away everything
good in my life
and tell me now

how do i live without you?
i want to know
how do i breathe without you
if you ever go
how do i ever, ever survive?
how do i oh how do i live?

without you,
there'd be no sun in my sky
there would be no love in my life
there'd be no world left for me
and i
baby, i don't know what i would do
i'd be lost if i lost you

if you ever leave
baby you would take away everything
real in my life
and tell me now

how do i live without you
i want to know
how do i breathe without
if you ever go
how do i ever, ever survive
how do i, oh how do I live
please tell me baby
how do i go on

sydney photos up

sydney photos are up!!

i'm losing it.
bond making bond breaking.
is it all part of life. part of love?
i know im young and there are still so much things that i yet to understand.
but i understand some things already.
i hate myself.
i just can't do anything right.
i piss people off.
im not a good daughter, good friend, good girlfriend.
i suck.
i dunno what's going to happen to me after this.
im just sitting around waiting.
waiting for the answer i want to hear.
but if i dun get it.. i'll try to live.

babe >> i'm not messaging you because you want some time alone. but you've become such a great part in my life. and if ever you, my angel, decide to spread your wings and take flight, i dunno what i am to do with my life. you're already the biggest blessing that God has showered on me. im sorry for being such a bitch. i really dunno how to live my life the way im supposed to that will please you and please the world. i can't make everyone happy i know.. but why can't i make you happy? why am i always like that? you know? seeing you happy and seeing you smile always gives me this great big joy in my heart.. i know cos i've only made you happy once. i dunno what im to do anymore.. i feel so heavy. so sad. so upset. just feel like living the life i used to live.. but i made a promise i would never do something so stupid as that again.. but is there any other way? i've no where to run to.. no one to run to anymore. i'm sorry. please tell me something soon ok? it's killing me.

in a nutshell

been so long since i last blogged.
haha. yeahh.. loads of things have happened.
good and bad!!

on 27 june 2005,
pjc choir left for downunder for the 16th australian international music festival. coolio. it was a 9 day thingum and it rocks mann!! haha. to cut the ultra long story short.. these are the following places that pjc choir went (: we've been to sydney opera house, sydney town hall, st. andrew's cathedral, darling harbour, captain cook cruises, the rocks etc!! haha. super funn. we had our competition in sydney town hall and the acoustics there are like woahh!! haha. we can hear echoes of our song. funky. and next stop was the performance at st. andrew's cathedral. (: it was fun. and last and the MOST cool one.. was SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE!! (: (: (: haha. yeahh.. real good. great experience and great bonding. with great shopping (: haha. the lessons with the renown clinicians were really good as well. our choir really learnt a lot from them.. and it really makes us cry knowing that was the last time the j2s are the perform with us.. always makes us cry tears of joy to know that the choir has grown so much and bonded so much during the past 9 days. and by the way.. we got a silver award (: and that's on international level mind you. it's pretty good since in the choral section, there was only like 1 gold, 3 silvers and the rest were bronze. haha. yeah. great fun!!

06072005
came back for the first day of my school and my oh my do i have loads and heaps to catch up on :( but still the trip was worth a little more hard work!! im prepared to work my butt off.. haha. and i did my econs test even though i didn't study. haii.. got 12/25. not bad for not studying.. but i was so sure i could do a lot better given the time.. went around and saw the bonded choir. really rocks. BIG TIME. we sat around and talked about everything!! from edison's embarrassing moments to the weird times when cuijing couldn't wake up.. the funny positions that ying hui slept in when she just konked out and the times when we just sat around and went SHOPPING!! (: haha. yeahh.. so fun. for the first time. choir is bonded. yes we are!! (: (: (: after that babe and i took a bus to who knows where 'cos i just wanted to spend more time with him.

07072005
happy birthday babee!! (:
my babee's 19 now.. so for 2 months, we'll be 3 years apart. haha. yeah.. he didn't come to school today cos of his leg injury but i went to deliver his presents!! haha. yeahh.. had quite a long day.. and stupid nancy went to lie to me!! HELLO!!! told me there was sectionals scared the shite out of me.. haha.. i was so stupid to believe her lahh.. so i mesaged jane and then jane got scared too!! haha.. and everyone got scared. stupid girl.. haha. yeah a relatively short day.. even though the amount of tutorials was unbearable. haha.

08072005
happy birthday desmond!!
today!! had math test which i barely passed. haha. but i did!! thanks to ade *winks* haha. had break then econs and the teachers put up a hilarious show for us for youth day!! so sweet of them.. it was so cute and funny.. haha. and some really good performances. (: after school had extra geog remedial. haii.. sian.. ended at 5. stayed back until like 8.30pm to play ball with choir. was supposed to start promptly at 5 but due to the other ccas we started late. jane and i were bored and started running round the track and everywhere haha. today mainly altos, one tenor and one bass!! haha. super fun.. did all the stupid stuff.. and jane kept scratching people with her ultra long finger nails.. and we were talking about clubbing as a choir. haha. cuteeee.. and to our HORROR, jane has been clubbing. she looks so innocent. haha. we were disturbing her about it lahh.. quite fun.. went home for dinner. thanks boonbee for the shorts!! (: haha YAYY!!

*sorry for the ultra summarised entry. im tired. haha

sarah low
ex-mgs-pjc
nus fass
facebook

turning 16
mgs gala night 2003
mgs founders 2004
happy make up day
mgs grad night 2004
pjc 1st 3 months
pjc choir
05A02 bbq
05A07 arts outing
05A07 class bbq
everything from everywhere
16th australian international music fest
mgs 118th founder's day
a day with chah
05A07 bbq & tummy's farewell
wee&rah
choir chalet day 1 at sentosa
05A02's second bbq
a day with milene
turning 18
snow city with wee
rach's birthday
pjc prom
05A07 chalet
bali
shanghai
zoo with ade&wee&ryan
genting+cameron pt1
genting+cameron pt2